Three Steps to Create a More Peaceful Life

We all need a more peaceful life

I don’t know a singe person who has told me “I just have too much peace in my life” or “my life is just too peaceful, I’m bored”. Everyone I know, myself included, longs for a more peaceful life. Days are just hectic between work, family, home projects, and friends. If you add in health problems or chronic issues it becomes even harder. People are craving a slower lifestyle, to feel like they don’t have to rush from one thing to another.

The Cottage-core Aesthetic

I believe a large part of the reason cottage-core has taken off the way it has is because it makes life look so peaceful. Slow days spent reading, drinking tea and enjoying the outdoors is the epitome of peace. Ample quiet time, dressing in pretty clothes, using your time to do things you enjoy; all of these things come to mind when I picture a peaceful day.

So what is a peaceful life?

Well, the opposite of peaceful is stressful. So I would say peace is the absence, or at least lessening, of stress. Stress can come from many things, including work, relationships, finances, and living arrangements. Many of us live in a constant state of heightened adrenaline; in other words, our bodies are equating these situations to being in danger (think being chased by a tiger). Living in this state takes a toll on our mental and physical health. So the pursuit of peace in our lives is worthwhile.

3 steps to a more peaceful life

Lets get started, shall we? Here are three things to consider to create more peace during your day:

First: Find time each day to be quiet

Even if you have to shut yourself in a closet for 5-10 minutes, get some alone time so you can breathe. Deep breathing will help signal your body that you are not in danger and to relax. I personally find that being in the dark, or at least dim light, helps me relax. As I have grown older I have found that I desperately need some time in the quiet each day or my mental health suffers. Overstimulation is a real thing. Tell the to-do list in your brain to be quiet for a minute, and just breathe.

Second: Work with your personality

Show of hands, who here has tried to do something in a way that just didn’t make sense because “that’s how it’s supposed to be done”? *raises hand* There are some things that do need to be done a certain way for safety, such as handling chemicals, food preparation and putting knives blade down in the dishwasher.

However, most things are flexible in the way they can be done. It also depends greatly on what is important to you. For example, I do not sort my laundry before I wash it. Everything goes in together and if the clothes can’t handle that, they don’t belong in my house. The only thing I separate out is towels and sheets, most of the time. To me, the time it would take to sort out clothes by person or color could be better spent on another project. Now, depending on your lifestyle and personality, that approach could be a horrible decision. You might have lots of dry clean only or clothes that bleed color. Maybe you enjoy sorting. The point is, examine the process you are using and if it’s stressing you out or taking extra time, perhaps it can be done a different way that would be more enjoyable.

Third: Practice Gratitude

This one could also be titled “look for the good”. Whether you want to call it gratitude or being positive or having the glass half full, it makes a big difference. Being grateful turns what you have into enough. Now, that doesn’t mean you can’t recognize where things can be improved and work towards that. Realize that if you spend your life always wanting what other people have or hating your own life, even when you make a change, upgrade that car, start a new job or get that relationship, it won’t be enough. You have to make a change in you.

Does your old beat-up car get you to work each day? Be grateful while you save for a newer one. Does your apartment with the paper thin walls give you a place to rest safely? Be grateful even while you save and plan to move to a better one.

Lets go a little deeper. I know, it’s hard. It’s hard to be grateful for the spouse when you’re in the middle of a disagreement and feelings are hurt. It’s hard to be grateful for the children when you’ve heard “mommy” 500 times today and they are hanging on you and demanding your attention. When you’ve balanced your financials three times and it just isn’t enough. But that’s when gratefulness and contentment really count. In the hard times is when your gratitude and positive outlook shine the brightest.

What now?

These are just starting steps. Ultimately each person’s life is different, so what looks peaceful to one might not to another. Really get to know yourself and what works for you, and then extend it out to what works for your family. Remember that compromise and flexibility are important in this journey.

If you have any suggestions you’d like to add, please leave them in the comments! I would love to hear what works for you.

Until next time,

Ariel